This topic reminds my days of glory in rural villages, Eastern Cape Province. By then, as young boys, we used to attend traditional norms which were coordinated by ladies. This kind of norm is coordinated by community ladies together with that one of that family, mostly at night for a period of a month. (ijaka). This tradition is performed at night only starting with a song outside in front of the kraal. After the song these ladies will go back to the house and they will sleep on that house until next day. As young boys, we go there for the sake of proposing these ladies to become our partners. Among ladies there are those who organize everything for us, therefore you just getting a chance to speak to her outside the house. Once you have this opportunity to speak with this lady, it’s either you convinced this lady at least to promise or to accept your proposal now? So in other words this lady might ask you to give her an opportunity to think about your proposal. The next time you meet, either approved or not.